12.11.2008

Who to choose...

My friend (a soon-to-be-bride-to-be...he hasn't asked, yet, but totally will) and I were talking about the sometimes dreaded task of choosing attendants. She only wants one attendant, while her boyfriend wants, "you know, 10 or so because he has like, 40 cousins."

I found this on wikipedia explaining the tradition of bridesmaids...

"The Western bridesmaid tradition is thought to have originated from Roman law, which required ten witnesses at a wedding in order to outsmart evil spirits (believed to attend marriage ceremonies) by dressing in identical clothing to the bride and groom, so that the evil spirits would not know who was getting married. Even as late as 19th century England, there was a belief that ill-wishers could administer curses and taint the wedding. In Victorian wedding photographs, for example, the bride and groom are frequently dressed in the same fashion as other members of the bridal party."


I love finding out how we carry on various traditions. Choosing bridesmaids for some is the best part of planning. For others, it is torture--how do they rate their closest friends not only to decide who will be in the wedding party, but also in order to choose a maid-of-honor? For my wedding, I decided not to have a maid-of-honor. It was hard enough leaving friends out of the bridal party. We had such a small wedding that if MD and I each had five attendants, 1/5 of the wedding guests would have been standing with us as we took our vows (we actually decided on three each and they sat down as we said our vows--I think this worked out nicely). It's okay to break tradition, especially if you look at how this one may have started.

You may want to have 7 bridesmaids, but if the argument comes up, you can choose none or one or two. It's totally up to you. You can ask your friend who likes to party to throw you a bachelorette night. Ask your super-organized friend to help you with the invitations and planning. Ask your Martha-like friend to throw you the shower. And you can ask your stylish friend to go with you to try on dresses. Each of close friends and family members will be honored that you thought of them (most really do want to help) and it can potentially eliminate cat-fights while saving your bestest friends from spending $300 on a dress they will never wear again.

[image: Wedding Dress Gallary]

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